Paying for college isn’t the parent’s responsibility in our family. At least that is how we are starting our trend since our oldest child is graduating this year, her college education will be her responsibility.
The reason why we will not be paying for college is simple. We cannot afford to take on a new debt.
I don’t know how or when it started.. but people assume that as parents we should automatically pay for our children’s college education and I’m here to say I don’t believe this to be true. Here’s why!
In our current situation, we are not debt free and we did not plan accordingly to start a college savings fund for our children. Should this be our child’s fault? No, but does that mean I’d feel differently if we had the means to pay for it? Absoutely Not!
I can’t tell you how many people I know, whose parents have handed over sums of money or took out loans to help their children pay for college to find out their child lacked motivation, never graduated and they were left with the crazy bill.
Since birth we’ve been assisting our children with their education and I feel that it’s time for them to take the next step on this important journey.. on their own.
If I don’t pay for their college education I feel that my children will…
- Work harder because it’s their own money
- Continue to look and put effort into scholarships, getting better grades
- Be more motivated to graduate, knowing they are responsible for their debt
My job going forward is to help them make a plan, give them options and provicde encouragement to help them succeed.
If they succeed and accomplish their goals, then… the fun begins.
If our financial situation changed. I still wouldn’t take on the responsiblity for their college education. Instead, I would love to put that money aside, and give it to them later as graduation present.
As parents, with or without debt, do you feel you should be paying for college?
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I agree whether having debt or not! We will probably help our kids thru college in some capacity but the brunt will be up to them. There’s no guarantee that all of our kids will even choose go to college, let alone complete it.
Angie I totally agree with you on that. I don’t know if our kids will choose college either. I am a firm believer in education and hope that each of my children obtain a college degree, but I’d be happy if they just choose to do something they love. Whether it be going to a trade school, joining the military, etc.
Love this and wholeheartedly agree!
As a student at UNLV I take notice of the students around me and can see who is putting in the effort to get good grades and who seems to be there just because their parents are funding their education. The ones who really want it work their butts off while the rest are often loud, obnoxious and unconcerned with what the instructor is teaching.
When I started college, I just wanted to be done with school. I was one of those lazy students that felt I had to be there because my parents were paying for it and it was the next step in my life. My dad finally stepped up and said since I wasn’t putting the effort in he was no longer going to pay for it.
So true! I love this! My parents had saved for our education, and while it was a great help to me and I was careful not to waste their money, my sisters both took university less seriously than they should have because it wasn’t their money. My mother has actually told me that if she had her time back she wouldn’t have paid for our education, and would have used the money to help us out in other ways.
I totally agree with everything in this post. I will not be saving to pay for my kids’ education past high school. Who knows what they will want to do?
I agree. I don’t think parents should have to pay for their child’s college education, and I think when kids have to do it mostly themselves — they get a lot more value out of it. They appreciate their education more and don’t take it for granted.
Horrible mother and horrible thinking! You knew college existed before you brought a child into this world, did so and now will have them facing the same troubles as you, which is not being able to live a debt free adult life. You and anybody agreeing are disgusting. It’s okay for your child to have to take up adult responsibilities, but adequately preparing your child for life, which includes education, is your job.
I wish everyone could find themselves privileged to be able to do this, but unfortunately, life isn’t a box we can check. We’ll just have to agree to disagree. PS. My oldest whose almost done paying off her student loan debt, doesn’t think I’m a horrible mother. 🙂