I’m a Christian who hates Christmas. I know I shouldn’t use the word hate because it is such a strong word so I’ll tone it down a bit. Over the past few years, I’ve dreaded Christmas.
I go to church regularly. I believe that the Lord is my Savior. I believe we are saved by grace, but yet being a faithful Christian, the Christmas spirit doesn’t come easy to me. Christmas used to be an enjoyable time of year. But lately, it’s stressful, expensive, and hard to find joy. I put weeks of work into the holiday with decorating the house, preparing foods, and shopping for all the gifts. It all gets overlooked in a matter of seconds Christmas morning when the exchange of gifts occur. The kids rush from present to present giving the impression that they really don’t care about the gift they opened.
Gift giving is more like gift expecting.
I have a love/hate relationship with gift exchanges. Gift exchanges are impersonal with family and close friends. In my mind, if I wanted to get you a gift I would. I don’t need to be forced to give a gift through an exchange. I do find them fun when I don’t know the recipient well. It’s a great way to get to know them better.
Where is the giving… Just because? God gave his one and only son to us. He asks us to accept the gift with nothing in return. That’s what the spirit of Christmas is all about.
That’s where my heart thrives. I thrive when I purchase gifts for others who aren’t expecting anything. I don’t expect to get anything in return. I also get disappointed when those friends or neighbors show up a few days later to return a gift. If I was on your Christmas list to begin with, I’m thrilled. But if you went out of your way to get me a gift, because I gave you one then please don’t! I just wanted you to know that you are appreciated. You are loved. The gift was given without any strings attached, just how God loves us.
Dictionary.com definition of Christmas: The annual festival of the Christian church commemorating the birth of Jesus: celebrated on December 25 and now generally observed as a legal holiday and an occasion for exchanging gifts
Urban Dictionary definition of Christmas: The celebration of the birth of commercialism. Oh yeah, and Jesus.
The Urban Dictionary definition is really how my heart feels and that’s why I’ve dreaded Christmas.
I know I must sound like the Grinch. But commercialism has ruined my spirits.
My husband doesn’t understand why I feel this way. Perhaps it’s because he actually gets to sit back and enjoy the season. He’d help if I’d ask him. But I rarely ask. I usually take on all the responsibilities myself.
I don’t want to hate Christmas. Therefore every year, I have to step back and really remember what this season is about.
- It’s about Jesus.
- It’s about Giving.
- It’s about Joy
- It’s about Love
It’s still an EFFORT to get into the spirit of Christmas. So I’ve put together some tips that help me get into the spirit. If you’re feeling the same way I do hopefully these tips can help you, too.
- Decorate. When the Christmas tree is up, you’ll find yourself drawn to the light, the beauty etc.
- Give. Without expectations. Buy a gift for a neighbor, friend, store clerk etc.. Or Pay it forward the next time you are at the coffee shop, gas station, etc. to a random stranger.
- Focus. Sit and watch the joy of children running down the stairs in excitement. Listen to their laughter, see those tears. All those joys and emotions we forget about.
- Volunteer. When you give of yourself to those in need, your heart can’t help to change.
- Participate. Examples: Caroling, glittering lights, concerts, parades, ballets, ice skating, decorating gingerbread houses and more.
- Gather. Get together with friends and join in on the spirit. Have a gift wrapping party, cookie exchange, movie night, etc.
- Read, Watch and Listen. Enjoy some Christmas classics or listen to your favorite Christmas songs.
- Relax. In the end, everything will get done. Just take it day by day.
- Remember. This season is a season. There will be a time when the kids are out of the house, we’ve lost loved ones and we need not take that for granted.
- ASK. Get help from others.
Update Dec 27 2023** I wrote this post a long time ago and with Christmas just ending a few days ago, I figured it would be a good time to reflect on it. Many of you have asked me whether or not I still feel this way. The answer is YES! For me, it’s shopping for gifts that continues to kill the spirit. Buying for my children, you would think it would be joyful to buy them a gift. But it’s not. They have everything, need nothing. I spend a lot of time searching and searching for something they could use, need, or like and if I’m being honest it’s hard to find joy in that. But when I focus on the giving it does help bring me back into the spirit of Christmas. Some of the ways I focus on the giving… I give an unexpected tip to a server. I buy an unexpected gift for a family. I bring treats to my neighbors or favorite places I do business with. I make personalized gifts. Those are just some of the things that bring me joy during the season.
What kills the season for you? How do you get back into the Christmas spirit?
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Thank you for this article. I don’t feel so much like an outcast. When I tell folks that I dislike Christmas, (not for what it represents, but for what is become) I get the reindeer in the headlights look. People can’t fathom why I could not enjoy this time of year. Its a breath of fresh pine scented air to know that I’m not alone in my struggles. I would also like to thank you for your tips on surviving this season. Honestly just knowing there are others like me helps, but the tips are above and beyond. Thank you for your honesty and passion about those of us that want to be jolly, but find it hard sometimes.
THANK YOU for writing this!! I Googled “Christian hate Christmas” and your post was one of the first hits. There’s so much hype leading up to Christmas and then, WOOSH, back to normal life. My husband is a pastor and here I am dreading Christmas.
Your post is from 2017. I’m curious to know if you feel any different in 2021.
Thank you for writing this. Its as if I wrote it myself, I have those exact feelings.
I feel so selfish and guilty and no one seems to understand. I do so desperately want to enjoy Christmas as an unconditional loving season but it’s so hard when it seems so contradictory. My will power is not that strong and I am very much still on a journey of submission of my life to Jesus completely.
Four years later, in a pandemic, I am writing this. I have always dreaded Christmas. The two months of being hit over the head by it, all the work and expense, and the true meaning of Christmas being overshadowed by consumerism. It’s all very sad. At the most, it’s one hour of church if people even think about going. Jesus has been forgotten.
Im sitting now at a mall feeling dissapointed sad…im a christian that now finds christmas annoying for the first time and…yes..its about Jesus…its a hypocrite season ..sorry but its true .
Im sitting now at a mall feeling disappointed sad…im a christian that now finds christmas annoying for the first time and…yes..its about Jesus…its a hypocrite season ..sorry but its true .
I hate Christmas because it’s rooted in paganism and the tree and everything about Christmas has very little to actually do with Jesus. He wasn’t even born in December. I did some research several years back that ruined Christmas for me because of the truth about the origins of it. Trust me when I tell you it has nothing to do with Jesus and is not rooted in biblical truth.
Thank you! The gift expectations and lists are not joyful. Giving to someone who never expected it is a joy, though. This article resonates with me, and I, too, am a Christian mom. It’s a struggle for me every year. I have about one week max of Christmas energy and after that I’m dreaming of putting the tree away!